Doug Pederson Could Learn from Jim Bob Cooter

I remember watching pieces of last week’s Lions and Cardinals game on the Red Zone Network during commercial breaks of the Eagles and Redskins game. During one series of pitiful running attempts the analyst made mention of how committed the Lions were to the run game, even though it wasn’t working, forcing the Cardinals respect the run.

The Lions trailed the Cardinals for 3 quarters, but kept mixing in runs here and there. The Lions ended up rushing the ball 21 times for 52 yards. That was almost 33% of the Lions plays. Not exactly balanced, but they did enough to keep the Cardinals honest. For those keeping score at home, that’s a whopping 2.47 yards per carry.

Against the Chiefs, the Eagles ran the ball 13 times, about 19% of their plays, for a similar 52 yards for an average of 4 yards a carry. That’s 62% better than the Lions attempts vs. the Cardinals, yet Pederson pretty much abandoned the run because he said it wasn’t “good enough.”

Pederson’s not good enough was far better than the Lions a week earlier. The Lions stayed with their atrocious running game and ended up coming back to win the game in the 4th quarter. The Eagles abandoned their mediocre running game and lost. Coincidence?

Maybe Pederson should watch that week 1 Lions/Cardinals game and take a couple of things away from Jim Bob Cooter.

1. Wear a hat instead of a visor.

2. Stick with the running game even if it’s not working.

Something tells me we’ll see a good amount of Blount this week. I’ll set the over/under on Blount rushing attempts at 12.5.



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Alshon Jeffery Came Up Small & Other Eagles/Chiefs Observations

Alshon Jeffery is listed as 6’3″. Eric Murray #21 on the Chiefs is listed  at 5’11”. Somehow, Murray got over Jeffery to tip the last ditch Hail Mary play at the end of the game and it wasn’t even close. Murray’s deflecting hand is at least ten inches higher than Alshon’s outstretched hand.

So, is Alshon shrinking? How does a 5’11” guy out-jump a 6’3″ guy? Terrible positioning for sure. Alshon might want to reach out to Joel Embiid for some boxing out and rebounding tips.

Daniel Sorensen may have had the play of the game when he launched himself into orbit to make a play on Wentz.

The FOX crew found a woman apparently in the middle of a sunglasses photo shoot during the game.

The Eagles offensive line struggled at times, like this play where five Eagles couldn’t block three Chiefs.

I want to get a beer with this woman. She looks like she’ll crush us all in beer bongs AND she’s totally down with going to a football game with a person wearing a gorilla costume and jersey. Seriously, who has a wife or girlfriend that would put up with that while pounding a Coors Light in a Koozie?

I never took Andy Reid as a fashion icon, but apparently his look is all the rage in Kansas City.

Ed Rendell looking sharp as hell on Eagles Postgame Live on CSN Philly. Is that Hugo Boss that he’s wearing?

Not related to the Eagles, but these dudes in Seattle clearly had the best beards of the day. I’m surprised they found time for the game. I figured they’d be glued to that new Hillary Clinton book. The guy in the middle is like the beard-less drummer of ZZ Top

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Rhys Hoskins is Also a Good Dude

Rhys Hoskins looks to be ready to take on Joel Embiid as the city’s favorite athlete. In addition to smashing home runs left and right, this happened today.

A guy named Andrew tweeted this picture of what I’m guessing is his son imitating Rhys and tagged Rhys in the tweet.

Later that day, at 4:14, Rhys Hoskins tweeted this back at Andrew.

Free tickets to bring the kid to the game tomorrow night! This guy is doing everything right.


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Phillies Usher Needs to Chill

Rhys Hoskins is on a home-run tear the likes of which Major League Baseball has never seen. Even he can’t help attendance at Citizens Bank Park these days.

Last night’s paid attendance (9/15) was announced as somewhere in the ballpark (pun intended) of 15,000. There couldn’t have been more than 8,000 people there. It was by far the smallest crowd I’ve seen in my fifteen years as a season ticket holder. The upper level was a total ghost town. The lower level wasn’t even half filled. This is a view from section in 111.

With the Phillies up 9-0 early, we decided to grab a beer and take a stroll around the park. We stopped behind section 120 when Rhys came up to bat. He drew a walk.

While watching Rhys, we witnessed an usher approach a younger couple, who were quietly watching the game, and ask them if they had tickets for the section. They didn’t and were asked to leave.

Here’s a photo of the section they were sitting it, as well as they over zealous usher.

The couple was seated in the third row from the back and were the ONLY people in the row.

That’s a total VIOLATION on this usher. And, it’s not the first time we’ve seen or wrote about this happening at CBP with a half-empty ballpark.

The couple wasn’t causing a scene. They weren’t cursing. They didn’t even have beers with them. Yet, this usher had to yield her power and kick them out of the section.

I get that seats in Section 120 aren’t cheap. But, the section is deserted. You can even see that the back rows of the next few sections are empty at a rate of like 90%.

Maybe they had standing room only tickets. Maybe they were from the upper level. Who cares? What’s the harm in allowing well-behaved people sit in seats that they may never be able to afford if they aren’t disturbing anyone and sitting in a seat that isn’t being used. This usher even looked proud of ridding Section 120 of these squatters.

I don’t get this at all. I would think the Phillies would rather have the lower level filled with fans because it would feel like a larger crowd instead of everyone dispersed around the ballpark.

I do get that it is difficult to have a litmus test of when you can and cannot allow people to sit in sections for which they do not have tickets. Here’s an idea. When you cut staff in half at kiosks and completely close down some food and beer kiosks like last night, let the ushers know to chill out with harassing fans about sitting in their proper seats.

The Phillies usually do right by customer service and ballpark experience. They need to tell the ushers to chill. No reason at all to eject this couple out of an empty row in a half-empty section. We’re aren’t being completely radical and asking to allow just anyone to sit with those important Diamond Club members, just a regular seat in a regular section.

Maybe the woman is afraid of losing her job if outsiders are found in her section. I don’t know any ushers to ask if this is a possibility. Do the Phillies run sting operations in an empty ballpark and send undercover operatives in to see if they can sit in sections where they don’t have tickets? I doubt it. If they do, then this is on the Phillies and not the usher, but I can tell you that we didn’t witness any other ushers checking tickets while people hopped around all night.


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Naked Philadelphians on Bikes: 2017 Edition (NSFW)

On Saturday hundreds of Philadelphians removed their clothes and hopped on their bikes of the annual Naked Bike Ride. I was lucky enough to be a Woolly Mammoth having a pint just as the crew made their way down South Street.

If case you missed it and want to see a bunch of naked Philadelphians on bikes or you just want to see them again, we got you covered with pictures and over 3 minutes of video.

The standout, of course, is the dude wearing only an Eagles replica helmet. Take a gander.


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Jim Schwartz Will Never Be Eagles Head Coach


People don’t like Doug Pederson. Fans on social media and on sports talk radio relentlessly point out that the Eagles biggest weakness is Doug Pederson, even after beating division rivals, Washington, on the road. Even when he wins, Doug Pederson can’t win. Schwartz won that game according to large portion of Eagles fans.

Reports of Jim Schwartz lying in wait to usurp Doug as Eagles head coach hit the news wire the day before the game. And, on the day after a Schwartz-led defense blitzed the stuffing out of Kirk Cousins making the Washington offense look feeble, people are biding their time until Schwartz eventually takes over.

Don’t hold your breath.

Schwartz is not the kind of guy Lurie prefers running his team. While Schwartz’s personality is perfectly tailored for the Philly fanbase, he’s not a “gold standard” type of guy that appeals to Lurie. Schwartz is a loose cannon. He’s the kind of guy you don’t want to fight because he might have a box-cutter stashed in his socks.

Ray Rhodes, Lurie’s first head coach, was an intense guy who cussed at players, but his aggression and intensity seemed under control. Maybe Ray Rhodes called other players a MotherF*cker after an incomplete pass, but he wasn’t ever caught with all the cameras tracking NFL games. Schwartz was.

Then Andy Reid came along. He’s a Mormon, who doesn’t drink, curse, or fight. Lurie seemed much more comfortable with this relationship. Reid was intense on the field, but as large and loud as he might get, he was still a polite, peaceful Mormon.

Reid would never be heard yelling “LEARN THE F*CKING RULES” over the stadium PA system. Jim Schwartz was.

Chip Kelly was just a football nerd. His edge and intensity was in science, stats, innovation. I can’t imagine Chip ever needing to be held back from trying to start a fight with Jim Harbaugh or 49ers players after a game ended. Jim Schwartz did.

Schwartz is bonkers. He’s probably gonna have success with whatever teams makes him a head coach because guys like him learn from their mistakes of the past and usually perform better the second time around.

Would we love him here in Philly? ABSOLUTELY. Would Jeffrey Lurie love Schwartz in the spotlight as his head coach here in Philly? ABSOLUTELY NOT.

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Get a New Best Friend at SUPER LOVE ADOPTION DAY

Thinking of adopting a new best friend? Actively searching for a new best friend?

You’re in luck.

One of the largest adoption events in the area is happening this Saturday (September 9th) at the Schmidt’s Commons in Northern Liberties. This is a rain date for the same event that usually happens in May. Upwards of 30 dog rescues will be attending bringing a variety of adoptable dogs of all ages and breeds.

Seriously, this is one of the more fun events in the city if you’re an animal fan.

Dozens of vendors and organizations will also be on hand, in addition to the dog rescues.

The weather is going to be perfect. Bring your dog with you to chill with other mutts and like-minded people, even if you’re not in the market for a new buddy.

If you are looking to make your life a little happier with a new barking buddy, you must visit this event.

Super Love Adoption Day runs from 11 a.m – 4 p.m. For more details, click here.

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3 Reasons Why Nelson Agholor Will Have a Breakout Year

photo via:

I left Eagles training camp this year with one thing in mind. HOLY SH*T did Nelson Agholor look good. Like everyone else, I heard and read the reports of Nelson looking much improved at this year’s camp. I disregarded them because it’s practice. We’re talking about practice. But, then I saw it.

He looked at home in the slot. Agholor looked quick, not fast. He schooled Malcolm Jenkins, one of my favorite current players, again and again. Jenkins was frustrated, pushing Agholor and jarring in his face. Then, Agholor burned him again for a TD during a red zone drill.

The Eagles’ staff seemed convinced enough to trade Jordan Matthews and hand Agholor the slot receiver duties. So, what suddenly gives?

I think there are three reasons why Agholor is set for a breakout year.

1. Nelson went into this season without any legal worries. That’s a massive deal. He had terrible allegations placed upon him last summer with a police investigation ensuing. Yes, he was cleared of all charges by the time training camp started, that’s a major mental and emotional experience to overcome.

He also didn’t know if he’d be suspended by the league for the accusations.

This is super heavy stuff to deal with while dealing with a new coaching staff and learning a new system.

2. HE’S PLAYING THE SLOT. This is huuuuuuuge. Nelson was consensus late 1st round/early 2nd round pick. However, most scouts and draft reports projected him as a slot receiver, not on the outside as the Eagles have used him for the past 2 years.


Agholor’s best position could be working from the slot as a reliable possession receiver who can step right into the punt-returner job on Day 1.


In a deep wide receiver class, Agholor flew under the radar for most of the pre-draft process, and becomes the fourth pass-catcher to go in the first round. He’s drawn comparisons to former teammate Marqise Lee, whom the Jaguars ended up taking in the second round of the 2014 NFL Draft. At 6-0, 198, Agholor has deceptive speed (4.42 40-time), and he can come in and play the slot immediately.


Experienced route runner displaying good footwork when running double moves and complex routes

Adept at finding holes in underneath coverage especially from the slot position

Displays consistent awareness in working back to the quarterback

3. He’s wearing number 13. This may not seem like a big deal, but #17 in Philadelphia is a big deal. The number should be retired and Harold Carmichael should be in the hall of fame. Carmichael is a figure that is often around the NovaCare complex as a team ambassador. That’s a burden for a young wide receiver to carry, but not so much for an established player like Alshon Jeffrey.

There you go. 2017 should be Agholor’s year. I’m in. I have Nelson on two fantasy teams hoping I can start him by week 3.

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Podcast Episode 21: F**K New York, Psychics, Game of Thrones Hair, and More.

What’s Kitty Glitter? NY sucks! A love letter to Nabisco. F**k, Marry Kill with Nicole’s mom. How does Daenerys from Game of Thrones curl her hair? K-Mart was a visionary shopping experience. Bad underwear. Psychics and more in the latest podcast.

It’s the podcast your mom warned you about.

Quote of the Podcast: “I’m getting your bagels and your cream cheese and you F**k right off!”

Hit the train, car or elliptical and listen. However, if you don’t have a sense of humor it’s probably not for you.


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Around Jawnville: South Philly Target Goes Beavers

The South Philly target is fully stocked on Phillies and Eagles gear and it’s right at the entrance hitting ya in the face as soon as you enter.

Shockingly, there isn’t any Sixers or Flyers gear at this impulse aisle of team fandom. Wait, if you look closely at the first photo above, there appears to be an orange Flyers shirt.

I went in for a closer inspection.


Not Flyers.

Stupid me. Why would I expect Flyers gear instead of OREGON STATE BEAVERS merch at the South Philly Target?

What the hell is going on? This makes no sense. Syracuse I would get. There’s a large contingency of Philly kids attending Cuse.

Are there South Philly kids playing on the Beavers football or basketball teams that I don’t know about? Is Target catering to the community of South Philly hipsters knowing that Oregon is mecca for hipsters?

Then, I noticed another flash of orange in my peripheral view. Flyers gear? Nah. A lone ORIOLES HAT (?!).

Who is doing the buying for this South Philly store? If they love orange and want orange just go Flyers.

If anyone knows why South Philly Target is expecting a run on Oregon State Beavers merchandise hit me up on twitter @ViolationsGreg and give me a heads up. This is bizarre. Does your local Target have random west coast university swag?

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